For the first time in my life, I remember feeling so utterly empowered, I did not desire a man or a romantic relationship to feel loved. This had come after a string of interesting interactions with men during my time in Canada. If I remember this time in my life, I'd also started to turn inwards. To start looking for the answers their, to start creating the things I wanted. After all that's what everyone was telling me. Create a life you love for yourself, focus on yourself and the right people will show up.
I didn't even care to relate to men. I had enough fueling my own passions. Perhaps enough to turn me off men or even remotely care about interacting with them in any kind of flirtatious way. Id had enough of the games, the dramas and everything else that came with entering into that arena.
We hear people talk about 'their other half' or you may have also heard of 'he completes me' (eye roll). What about two complete wholes coming together? Did you ever think about that? Because this theory rains true. If you don't possess a quality that you want, don't go searching for it in someone else, develop it for yourself.
Fast forward a few years and I was back in Australia, moving into a new place. My 40 something year old male housemate told me 'I'm always happier when I'm in a relationship.' Does that sound familiar? How sad a life that would be. After all he was single, did he actually rely on someone else to make him feel happier?
First of all this is not anyone's roll....to make you happy, that's your responsibility. How could we possible expect that of another human being? We must look to ourselves for happiness, not anyone else. I'd expect the job of making someone happy would be a full time position - sounds exhausting to me.
If we go back to the start, were are attracted to people in the beginning because we love who they are? We love what they do, what they stand for, the way they think, the ideas they have and adventures they create. What if we were able to let them focus on being the very best version of themselves? What if we were to focus on being the very best version of our self? Then the reasons we fell in love with them in the first place would be so apparent and clear. Create happiness for yourself and you will attract someone who loves you for what you are.
Complete yourself, find yourself, love yourself first. The rest will follow...
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